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Two years have passed and I am done thinking - by M.A.

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'O' Level student-inmate from Tanah Merah Prison

Consolation Prize

 

I am the crown of my host. Apparently, it is widely known that I am the only organ that is capable of naming myself. Bestowed with that special ability, I have decided to name myself Brain. One way or the other, I am always inclined to wake my hosts’ life a breeze by generating ideas that are astounding but does not necessarily agree with the law. Sensing desperation from my host to indulge in his cravings of illegal substances, I persuaded him to start selling the very substance he is addicted to: Crystal Meth. It was this decision that led us to our downfall when we were arrested and given a sentence of five years imprisonment with five strokes of the cane. Two years have passed and I am done thinking. I promise my host that I will change for the better and will only think of what is good for both of us.


I am crucial to the gang. I provide information to Brain. Whatever sounds I can conjure that is deemed beneficial to Brain, I will not hesitate to do so. For that, Brain call me Ears. Before my incarceration I would only listen to what new chemicals is available so that my host can be the first to try it out. Sadly, I choose to filter out the constant advice of loved ones. Brain keeps telling that what I am choosing to listen was right. With motivation from an intelligent leader such as Brain, I started to find out more about drugs. Listening for which one of these illegal substances will give my host the ultimate high. Due to that reason, I am partly to blame for sending my host to prison. Till this day, whispers from my loved ones keeps ringing. I finally realised how true the advices given to me were. I made a vow to my host that from now, I will only listen to what’s good for both of us.


I am the twins that can convey images to Brain. Upon seeing drugs laid on the tale, I will instantly alert Brain of the opportunity to get high. Therefore, with this ability, Brain calls me Eyes. What mattered most to me was that whenever my host calls for it, I can instantly show him locations of where he can get his fix. It got to a level whereby if the drugs is not physically there, I provide my host with images of the crystalline substance to ensure that my host will go out of his way to obtain it. Because of this, I had convinced my host to steal, cheat and rob. As far as I am concerned, I am the most evil amongst the five. Right now in prison, I can only see positive stuff like books, which are filled with knowledge. I realised how wonderful it is compared to the past. As of today, I am taking a stand to only see what is good for both of us.


I am garrulous by nature. My enhanced ability to elucidate and convince people to join my host in indulging his bad habits are impeccable. I did many wonders with words. I had done many regretful things. For this reason, Brain named me Mouth. The most regretful thing I have done in Brain’s opinion was the constant barrage of lies I kept feeding my host’s mom. Lies to obtained whatever cash I can from that old lady who truly loves my host with all her heart. After my host was sentenced, I came clean with my host’s mom. There was no more lies but to make up for it, I have been constantly apologising. 218 days have passed since that day but still I am seeking forgiveness. I told my host enough is enough and will only produce words that is good for both of us.


My ability is different from the rest. I have direct access to Brain. Should my host demand it, I am willing to snort whatever chemical my host feeds me, and for this reason, Brain named me Nose. My ability to provide a different kind of high that is a mixture of pain and pleasure is the reason why I am my host favourite. Not to mention that the high I can give my host is almost instant. Whatever product that goes through me will instantaneously feed Brain the euphoria it needs. It is too late when my host realise that he had done extreme damage to me. I have lost the ability to smell. The actual ability I was good for. Nowadays, my host looks at food but don’t find it as appetising. It is regrettable but nobody else was to be blame. Now I only provide oxygen for my host which I strongly believe is what is good for both of us.


Collectively, we took an oath. We sternly promise to provide our host only the best. We will not be as reckless as we used to be. How silly were we to think that the world is in our hand. We regret our past decisions, but that further fuels our determination to change for the better. As the saying goes, “Rome was not built in a day”.


Slowly but surely, we will change and be a positive influence to our host. We, as the five senses of our host will face any challenges head on because it is what’s best for all of us. Without a shadow of a doubt, we will succeed. Yes, we will.

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