If I could make a deal with God, I would change everything - by G.G.Y.

Essay Title: A Letter to my Younger Self 

Consolation Prize – A21

By G.G.Y., a ‘N’ Level student-inmate from Institution TM1

(Note: All names used in this essay are pseudonyms)

Dear little me, 

I hope this letter finds you well, there’s so much I would like to say that I don’t know where to begin. I wonder what are you doing right now? Are you having fun? Are you happy? There’s so much I wish that I’ve done at your age sadly that would be impossible. 

How has primary school been? Have you met your good friends Matt and Alex yet? Stop spending so much time playing online games, go out and interact with the neighbourhood kids and learn to be more social. I would like to remind you to start focusing on your studies, start paying more attention in Maths class and write down notes. Instead of playing games the whole day, start to spend an hour or two revising for your exams. 

I know I sound naggy like mum but I’m telling you this for your own good. Although our sister was in the hospital for such a long time that doesn’t mean that it is the end. It wasn’t anybody’s fault, don’t beat yourself over it. You should have sought help from our teachers, they care for you and worry about you all the time.  

Start spending more time with mum and dad, even though they were busy that didn’t mean that they forgot about you. Time won’t wait for you, everybody grows old, mum and dad aren’t getting any younger. Go out with them for a meal, if not just be there for them when they get home from a long day of work and ask how have they been. Spend more time with ah ma and ah kong as well, start to visit them more often and ask more about their past, you don’t even know their names. Don’t keep pretending that life would wait for you. If you don’t prepare yourself now you’re gonna suffer in the years to come, do you want to be a disappointment for the rest of your life? 

Even though you didn’t get into the school you wanted that doesn’t mean it’s the end. Zhenghua is a good school, you will make lots of friends and memories that will last you a lifetime. Remember to focus during class and pay attention. Stop skipping school, and going out drinking. Although you feel happy in the moment it’s only temporary, nothing last forever. Don’t start the addiction, you don’t need it, all it has done is ruin your life and future. 

Continue going to school, you’re a smart kid, you’re just lazy. There’s no easy way out in life, choose your CCA wisely, and make sure to attend it every week. Figure out what you like and go for it, by doing this you can build up your values such as discipline and responsibility. You can also make new friends and learn to improve on your communication skills. 

Don’t forget to spend time with family, there’s no one else who cares for you like they do. Start to build your relationship with mum dad and sis by going out for family dinner or just by simply talking to them, don’t think that they don’t understand you, they do, they’ve been on this earth much longer than you have. Start to change your mindset to become more positive, don’t keep yourself trapped in that endless loop. Just believe in yourself and trust that you can do it, everybody’s rooting for you. Nobody wants to see you fall. 

Learn how to control yourself and know when enough is enough, remember to control your drinking habits, don’t let it take control and make a fool out of yourself. Don’t let your emotions take control of you, when you’re stressed or angry go downstairs and talk a walk to relieve it, don’t keep it all inside or it would one day burst and you may do something that you would regret for the rest of your life. 

Friends are important too, don’t forget to spend time with them, vent to them and be more open. They won’t make fun of you, some of them have been through worst so they are able to advice you on what to do. 

Last but not least, don’t be a dumbass and harm yourself over a girl, she wasn’t everything, if she truly loved you, why would she have left you for him. Another reason is, you’re immature and childish. So learn to grow up, get a job, earn money, build up your social skills and improve overall as a person first before thinking about being in a relationship. If you can’t even take care of yourself, how are you gonna take care of others? 

I hope that after reading this you would take my advice and change, even if it’s insignificant currently, it would shape your path in the future. If I could make a deal with God, I would change everything. 

With Love,

Yourself from the future